In many parts of the world women are making progress in all walks of life. This is definitely something to celebrate! That said, there are a million and one obstacles that must still be moved while being bombarded subtly or not so subtly by messages that lead us women to do less than what we can possibly do.
Recently on India’s Republic Day, January 26, in the nation’s capital, a horrific crime of rape and shaming was committed against a young married women and the worst was: “Some people in a cheering crowd called for her to be raped. Many were women.” When we were discussing this case in FIN, our young male staff member Abhishek Pathak said: “What else do you expect madam – our TV and cinema are usually sending the message that women are the worst enemy of a woman! We do not often see stories where women help women to grow – it’s always a hero who is saving the heroine.”
This gave me the idea that we must fight this subtle pervading notion that women never help other women. So in Kameswaram village we made an announcement that we wanted to hear true accounts from women who had been helped by other women. We obtained 9 accounts from nine women. I made up the evaluation criteria in terms of the effort, novelty and impact of the help obtained. At FIN every event/initiative in the village is given the same care as for any grandiose academic/corporate event. The judges were the FIN staff , trustees and associated family members living in cities in India and elsewhere and the scoring was independent and sent to me.
The accounts were sent as whatsapp messages. And when we heard them – most of us cried (and I cried so hard I missed my metro station and landed in another part of town!). In eight out of the nine cases – the heroine who had helped the woman was the MOTHER! There are three noteworthy points. First, macro-data and the trends derived therein, such as the prevalence of “son-preference” in India must be taken with a pinch of salt – in the sense, that it may not hold for every household in every village in India. For these mothers had given equal love to their daughters as to their sons. Second, education is one of the main drivers of women’s empowerment, as most of these mothers had sacrificed themselves and worked to the bone so that their daughters could be educated and have a better life. Third, the accounts were both humbling and insightful as the power of a mother’s love was manifested and its impact demonstrated through these accounts.
So what better way to celebrate women’s day than by inviting these women and their loved ones to a good lunch, giving our prizes to the top three and gifts to all? This is what we did. Amutha madam did the planning. Amutha madam and Rajkumari madam were also responsible for the recordings and accompaniment. Paranjothi sir got all the required materials and food. Nagalaxmi madam and Ranjita madam helped to clean our office and welcome all our guests. I sent them my video message of thanks. Raji madam called them similarly on behalf of all judges. And we all feel happy. Yes – we now know that women can and do help other girls and women do better in life! Three cheers for that!